Well the annual Relief Society Broadcast was tonight and it was again just phenominal! I am glad that as I am growing ....older isn't the right word, and neither is 'maturing' lol... but as I prioritize things in my life, the church and gospel has truly become a central beacon to my life, decision making, and planning. Tonights speakers included all three members of the General Relief Society presidency, followed by Pres. Monson. Most of the notes I took are for my eyes only and will forever live in my written journal, but some interesting points to ponder are as follows:
-God is a God of love - why else would he have created the plan of happiness, and given us free agency, etc.
-Faith and hope can get you through most everything - we just need to know where to direct that faith and hope.
-Visiting Teaching - allos us to show compassion and be like Christ. If we think of our visiting teaching in a way of 'what would Jesus do' to help this/these sisters, our visiting teaching will turn from being a duty to being an act of love and service for others. Visiting teaching is -never- done!
-Charity Never Faileth. Charity is the pure love of Christ. Thus: The Pure Love of Christ Never Faileth.
-President Monson's anecdote on judging others: Lisa and Tom moved into a new neighborhood. Lisa looked out the window at her neighbor hanging out her laundry and was appalled! "Tom, that laundry is filthy! Our neighbors don't have the foggiest on how to clean their clothing!" and so on every time the neighbors put out their clothes Lisa would comment on the awful job she did on washing her clothing. One day she looked out her window and gasped. "Tom! Look at our neighbors - she finally learned how to clean her clothes - look how clean they are!" Tom looked at Lisa and asked her if she wanted to know how the neighbors had done it. Lisa of course was beyond curious and Tom looked at her and said "this morning before you got up, I washed our windows."
President Monson's talk (anecdote and the rest of the talk he gave) struck a cord with me. I am the first to admit I am judgmental, and I am even quicker to admit on occasion when I feel judged. I hope to take some of his wonderful points on judgement and charity and truly apply them into my life. Again, I would love to share more but that is all I feel I should publicly share.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
The Bowen Therapy
My mom is who introduced me to Bowen. I had never heard of it, and had no intention of really doing much with it, but then my mom was having some major success! She has had chronic back pain for 10+ years and now she has little to NO backpain what-so-ever. How is that even possible you ask? Well Bowen did it! She has had 3 sessions and voila - results. I became interested, and more specifically I was interested in the "simplicity" of it. As alot of you know I am trained in Touch for Health, and though I love TFH, I was having a hard time with it because it is so broad and I lacked confidence in myself on treating other people. I just didn't know where to start all the time! (that's a whole other blog though)
So what IS Bowen? That's a really good question. I still don't really know how to describe it! But, I thought I would use my blog to do my homework. Our assignment for next class is in our own words describe what Bowen is. So here is attempt #1.
In a Bowen treatment a person would come to the practitioner with their ailment, pain, or whatever else is bothering them. At that point after deciding where to start, the client would lay down (easiest to lay down but can be done standing or sitting) and as a practitioner I would make various "moves" over different muscles, fascia and tissue. These moves are small rolling motions, and when a move is done it triggers the nervous system (kind of like a guitar string, you strum it and it vibrates for a moment and settles). After you make the move (or in some cases a couple moves) the practitioner leaves the room for a few moments to allow the body to integrate the movement made (in the guitar string theory, we are waiting for the vibration to stop). After those few moments I would come back and continue - leaving the room after movement (or set of) made.
That's more of less it! We are sending signals to your nervous system who in turn signals the brain that a change is happening and your body readjusts itself. Pretty neat huh?
And for now, that is my best definition of Bowen (in my own words). I need people to practice on and people to be my case studies, so all volunteers welcome!!
So what IS Bowen? That's a really good question. I still don't really know how to describe it! But, I thought I would use my blog to do my homework. Our assignment for next class is in our own words describe what Bowen is. So here is attempt #1.
In a Bowen treatment a person would come to the practitioner with their ailment, pain, or whatever else is bothering them. At that point after deciding where to start, the client would lay down (easiest to lay down but can be done standing or sitting) and as a practitioner I would make various "moves" over different muscles, fascia and tissue. These moves are small rolling motions, and when a move is done it triggers the nervous system (kind of like a guitar string, you strum it and it vibrates for a moment and settles). After you make the move (or in some cases a couple moves) the practitioner leaves the room for a few moments to allow the body to integrate the movement made (in the guitar string theory, we are waiting for the vibration to stop). After those few moments I would come back and continue - leaving the room after movement (or set of) made.
That's more of less it! We are sending signals to your nervous system who in turn signals the brain that a change is happening and your body readjusts itself. Pretty neat huh?
And for now, that is my best definition of Bowen (in my own words). I need people to practice on and people to be my case studies, so all volunteers welcome!!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Parenting Skills
This past weekend (Sept 18-19) I had the opportunity to start my journey in learning a new healing technique called "Bowen" which will be a blog of its own. But my instructor in her introduction of herself mentioned that she is a Child Attachment counsellor. Well Logan is a highly attached baby which has caused lots of various changed in my life, but a big one is that I have not slept an entire night through since he was born. (That isn't an exaggeration).
In short this was Logan's life: He was born and I miraculously chose to nurse him (for those who do not know I was completely anti nursing). We quickly discovered that unless I was in the room or in some cases physically holding him, I was the only one he would be soothed by. He did not want a soother, he did not want a blankie, he did not want a stuffed animal or toy. It was me. I nursed him when he was sad, I nursed him to sleep, I nursed him when he was hungry. He was a thorough nurser - and a part of my reason for doing that was cuz he had discomfort as a baby and it calmed him down so why not do what works right? Anyways - as the months went on, by the time he was a mere three months old we learned that he also wanted nothing to do with his father! Can you believe that? Unless I was in the room he wouldn't go to or stay with him. It was a huge crutch in our lives because I sometimes just needed to 'get out' but Logan would just scream and scream and scream until I returned causing anguish on both father and baby. So I gave up my freedom because of my love for both of them. I would only go out when he was napping, or when we had a concrete distraction that I knew I would be safe for half an hour, etc.
Sorry, tangent there - Logan was that way until he was about 12 months old when he allowed Michael into his life. In the meantime - night time was a problem. Logan would NOT sleep through the night. Longest stretch he ever went was probably 4 hours (even to date). When we moved from the basement suite to the townhouse he wouldn't go in his crib even. It caused him undue stress and trauma despite our best efforts. So he now sleeps with me which in the beginning was just a way to allow ME some sleep. Long story short he is 16 months old now and he still doesn't sleep through the night and he will not sleep without me close by despite our best efforts.
Okay - that was crucial background I promise. Now this instructor of mine, I pulled her aside at lunch time and asked her if I could pick her brain, and briefly explained my situation - my question was how do I 'fix' this. My first mistake she told me is that I am thinking of this whole situation as a -problem-! She said this is your son's life and you don't ever want him to feel as though he is a problem, and secondly, this is not a negative thing (aside from the occasional day I feel tired of course) as it is just how he is.
We continued to discuss various things and she gave me one really good analogy from a conference she attended. A lady seperated the group she was speaking to into 3 groups. Group 1: People who eat meals on schedule. Group 2: People who can skip meals and it doesn't phase them. Group 3: Grazers. The speaker then went to group 1 and discussed with them how they are - 'so you can't miss a meal huh?' 'heavens no! if i miss a meal i get shaky and light headed...' and so on. And then group 2 - 'so missing a meal doesn't bug you?' 'are you kidding? I can be working on a project and look at the time and think wow it's 4:00 and i didn't even eat lunch!' .....same thing to the grazers. The speaker then went back to group 1 and asked them how they would react if they had a child who was from group 2. Would you force your child to change despite their personalities? Is group 2 -wrong- for the way they eat? Of course not! That's who they are.
The point then is that Logan is a certain way. Yes he's not the way that I am - I need (well needed lol) 8 consecutive hours of sleep to function. Logan doesn't. He is fully rested at the end of the night with his 2-3 hr spurts with a moment of waking up to check his surroundings, etc.
Then we had a conversation about attachment. All through a child's life we are constantly teaching them things. 'Sleep by yourself', 'Don't talk back to me', 'Don't be angry', etc. But my instructor said that wouldn't you prefer that your baby be attached to you? Wouldn't you prefer your baby be able to express emotions? Wouldn't you prefer your baby know how to say no (cuz as a teenager I would love for my son to be able to say no to his peers if necessary!) She said take a look at me and my husband. My husband and his family are very close. My family is not. I am peer attached. My peers are more important than my family because that is who I had to turn to. Who do you want Logan to turn to first? Family or peers? Wouldn't you rather have Logan feel loved and know where he can go if he needs love or comfort or attention or advice, etc? .... I'm not portraying this conversation on paper very well, but it was really touching to me! Lots of great comments were made.
Anyways, there was so much more in the conversation I would love to share. She just helped me realize that I am not wrecking my son. I am constantly living in a state where I feel like I am being judged by others because Logan is different. But after talking with her I feel so much more rooted in myself and so much more confident in myself. Each child will be different, and I am SO happy to know that I will be adaptable to each. (cuz heaven knows that if baby #2 sleeps through the night in his/her own crib I am not going to try and stop it! lol)
In short this was Logan's life: He was born and I miraculously chose to nurse him (for those who do not know I was completely anti nursing). We quickly discovered that unless I was in the room or in some cases physically holding him, I was the only one he would be soothed by. He did not want a soother, he did not want a blankie, he did not want a stuffed animal or toy. It was me. I nursed him when he was sad, I nursed him to sleep, I nursed him when he was hungry. He was a thorough nurser - and a part of my reason for doing that was cuz he had discomfort as a baby and it calmed him down so why not do what works right? Anyways - as the months went on, by the time he was a mere three months old we learned that he also wanted nothing to do with his father! Can you believe that? Unless I was in the room he wouldn't go to or stay with him. It was a huge crutch in our lives because I sometimes just needed to 'get out' but Logan would just scream and scream and scream until I returned causing anguish on both father and baby. So I gave up my freedom because of my love for both of them. I would only go out when he was napping, or when we had a concrete distraction that I knew I would be safe for half an hour, etc.
Sorry, tangent there - Logan was that way until he was about 12 months old when he allowed Michael into his life. In the meantime - night time was a problem. Logan would NOT sleep through the night. Longest stretch he ever went was probably 4 hours (even to date). When we moved from the basement suite to the townhouse he wouldn't go in his crib even. It caused him undue stress and trauma despite our best efforts. So he now sleeps with me which in the beginning was just a way to allow ME some sleep. Long story short he is 16 months old now and he still doesn't sleep through the night and he will not sleep without me close by despite our best efforts.
Okay - that was crucial background I promise. Now this instructor of mine, I pulled her aside at lunch time and asked her if I could pick her brain, and briefly explained my situation - my question was how do I 'fix' this. My first mistake she told me is that I am thinking of this whole situation as a -problem-! She said this is your son's life and you don't ever want him to feel as though he is a problem, and secondly, this is not a negative thing (aside from the occasional day I feel tired of course) as it is just how he is.
We continued to discuss various things and she gave me one really good analogy from a conference she attended. A lady seperated the group she was speaking to into 3 groups. Group 1: People who eat meals on schedule. Group 2: People who can skip meals and it doesn't phase them. Group 3: Grazers. The speaker then went to group 1 and discussed with them how they are - 'so you can't miss a meal huh?' 'heavens no! if i miss a meal i get shaky and light headed...' and so on. And then group 2 - 'so missing a meal doesn't bug you?' 'are you kidding? I can be working on a project and look at the time and think wow it's 4:00 and i didn't even eat lunch!' .....same thing to the grazers. The speaker then went back to group 1 and asked them how they would react if they had a child who was from group 2. Would you force your child to change despite their personalities? Is group 2 -wrong- for the way they eat? Of course not! That's who they are.
The point then is that Logan is a certain way. Yes he's not the way that I am - I need (well needed lol) 8 consecutive hours of sleep to function. Logan doesn't. He is fully rested at the end of the night with his 2-3 hr spurts with a moment of waking up to check his surroundings, etc.
Then we had a conversation about attachment. All through a child's life we are constantly teaching them things. 'Sleep by yourself', 'Don't talk back to me', 'Don't be angry', etc. But my instructor said that wouldn't you prefer that your baby be attached to you? Wouldn't you prefer your baby be able to express emotions? Wouldn't you prefer your baby know how to say no (cuz as a teenager I would love for my son to be able to say no to his peers if necessary!) She said take a look at me and my husband. My husband and his family are very close. My family is not. I am peer attached. My peers are more important than my family because that is who I had to turn to. Who do you want Logan to turn to first? Family or peers? Wouldn't you rather have Logan feel loved and know where he can go if he needs love or comfort or attention or advice, etc? .... I'm not portraying this conversation on paper very well, but it was really touching to me! Lots of great comments were made.
Anyways, there was so much more in the conversation I would love to share. She just helped me realize that I am not wrecking my son. I am constantly living in a state where I feel like I am being judged by others because Logan is different. But after talking with her I feel so much more rooted in myself and so much more confident in myself. Each child will be different, and I am SO happy to know that I will be adaptable to each. (cuz heaven knows that if baby #2 sleeps through the night in his/her own crib I am not going to try and stop it! lol)
Moving...
Well, I have to admit, a part of me has always loved moving. It is a chance to go through all your stuff and de-junk or take a little trip down memory lane as you go through things and you have a chance to clean things thoroughly! Also I love the adventure of settling somewhere knew - kind of like a 'fresh start' if you will!
On the other side of the coin moving takes alot of time and energy, and up to this point in my life my parents have done the grunt of the work, or it's just been -my- stuff, not my stuff, my husband's stuff AND a toddler's stuff (and all his boxed up baby stuff, etc). Also adding a new twist to it this time around is that up until this point I never settled anywhere before! As a child you're fairly pliable, and whenever we moved it was just around the same town. As a 'single adult' I didn't mind the unknown because it just fit everything else in my life! But now.. I have been married three years, have a child, a great church calling, friends, and the list goes on. I am actually heartbroken to give up my 'comfort zone' that I am currently in!
I should say though, deep down the love of the adventure still looms and once we're actually moved life will resume again and I will once again become settled but in the mean time it's more of a challenge than I EVER anticipated!
The House Hunt
We started looking for housing about 2 weeks ago. We were quickly reminded that no renter wants to rent a home until the very time you can move in! So for me that is a huge struggle because I am impatient and a planner and need closure - but I have no choice except to wait until October 1st before I can even start LOOKING!
In the mean time though I had an extremely stressful experience with a lady who meant well but still caused me undue stress. She offered us her place to move in Oct 1st and through a long drawn out process told us she wanted us to move and would waive the damage deposit. Incredible right? Well the problem is that we are tied to our current place and have to pay rent here also. The lady (wealthier than I of course) saw it as since we said we could pay her the d.d. Oct 1st, we were neither out money and would still get our d.d back from our current place. WELL.. from someone who is on the verge of beyond broke, the beauty of a d.d is that we will get it -back- at the end of our time in that home. But she was so persistant and it just caused me undue stress because I have a hard enough time saying no, so after saying no multiple times she still persisted. The long and short of it is that the house was -ok- but not ok enough... it had some issues that I was concerned about on Logan's behalf more than anything.
So we will wait until the first of October and try again! And in the mean time I will continue to -think- about packing but probably won't start for a few more weeks :) Wish us luck!
PS. The reason we are moving for those who don't know, is that Michael has a new job out in Cochrane.
On the other side of the coin moving takes alot of time and energy, and up to this point in my life my parents have done the grunt of the work, or it's just been -my- stuff, not my stuff, my husband's stuff AND a toddler's stuff (and all his boxed up baby stuff, etc). Also adding a new twist to it this time around is that up until this point I never settled anywhere before! As a child you're fairly pliable, and whenever we moved it was just around the same town. As a 'single adult' I didn't mind the unknown because it just fit everything else in my life! But now.. I have been married three years, have a child, a great church calling, friends, and the list goes on. I am actually heartbroken to give up my 'comfort zone' that I am currently in!
I should say though, deep down the love of the adventure still looms and once we're actually moved life will resume again and I will once again become settled but in the mean time it's more of a challenge than I EVER anticipated!
The House Hunt
We started looking for housing about 2 weeks ago. We were quickly reminded that no renter wants to rent a home until the very time you can move in! So for me that is a huge struggle because I am impatient and a planner and need closure - but I have no choice except to wait until October 1st before I can even start LOOKING!
In the mean time though I had an extremely stressful experience with a lady who meant well but still caused me undue stress. She offered us her place to move in Oct 1st and through a long drawn out process told us she wanted us to move and would waive the damage deposit. Incredible right? Well the problem is that we are tied to our current place and have to pay rent here also. The lady (wealthier than I of course) saw it as since we said we could pay her the d.d. Oct 1st, we were neither out money and would still get our d.d back from our current place. WELL.. from someone who is on the verge of beyond broke, the beauty of a d.d is that we will get it -back- at the end of our time in that home. But she was so persistant and it just caused me undue stress because I have a hard enough time saying no, so after saying no multiple times she still persisted. The long and short of it is that the house was -ok- but not ok enough... it had some issues that I was concerned about on Logan's behalf more than anything.
So we will wait until the first of October and try again! And in the mean time I will continue to -think- about packing but probably won't start for a few more weeks :) Wish us luck!
PS. The reason we are moving for those who don't know, is that Michael has a new job out in Cochrane.
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