Can't look in the mirror

Ugh, I can barely stand to look at myself in the mirror these days! Im not gaining weight per say but I am chubbing up in areas of my body that I haven't ever had to deal with before (my face is chubbier and my stomach). I've always carried my weight (and still do) in my hips/thighs/butt but now it's other areas too. Ugh, not sure if it's age or a hormonal shift in my body... ever since my surgery and Carter's pregnancy everything is completely different for me!

Sadly self image is very important to me. I almost feel like I have to repent for complaining about my body so much! I am VERY scared because I have little to no self control it seems, and i'm at the half way mark of my breastfeeding 'life'- and i'm sure i'm not gaining extra weight because of the BF. I need to figure out a way to get into a state of mind where I can reject the cookie or cake or snack and just eat healthy proteins and vegetables. Yes I -like- cookies, cakes and snacks but my body will never be where I want it to be if I continue to eat them, and eat them in excess!

I have asked a good friend of mine to help me this week coming in particular to follow a food plan that i've come up with (I've attached it below here as well so I can be accountable to my blog lol weird huh?) ..Anyways, wish me luck.

	Breakfast	Lunch	Supper
Monday	Cream of Wheat	Salad (lettuce, pepper	Shepherd's Pie
	Banana	cucumber, carrot)
		plus poppyseed dressing
Tuesday	Cream of Wheat	Leftover Shep. Pie	Chicken Thighs
	Banana		(seasoned, not breaded)
			M&M Meat Veggies
Wednesday	Cream of Wheat	Salad (lettuce, pepper	Crockpot Chicken Taco Chili
	Banana	cucumber, carrot)	and Salad
		plus poppyseed dressing
Thursday	Cream of Wheat	Leftover Taco Chili	Lazy Man Cabbage Rolls
	Blueberries		plus green beans
Friday	Cream of Wheat	*undecided - depends on	LADIES NIGHT *plan to have
	Blueberries	what's left in my fridge	a couple treats so will have
			a light salad for supper
Saturday	Rice Cake & Peanut	*likely will eat out with	Funeral Potatoes &
	butter & Banana	family - eating out food choices	Chicken parmasan (homemade)
		aren't a problem for me	plus veggies - not sure what kind
			yet