My Bowen experience

So yesterday afternoon I went and received some Bowen - my major complaint is I have had some serious back pain in the kidney region of my back and it's been waking me/keeping me up at night, so I figured it was high time to go in. I also know that I have been harboring some anger within my body, which I without a doubt think contributed to my back pain. (Kidneys 'hold' anger, and other emotions). I told her this before hand because I knew it would come up during my session lol, basically I warned her that if I tear up it's cuz I have some emotions needing to be let go.

Anyways, my friend and collegue agreed to do a Bowen trade. I will admit I feel like I got the better end of the deal because she has her module 8 and specialized 9 while I recieved my 7 and had to put my learning on hold (baby & finances). She also has taken something called Mind-body Bowen. I cannot WAIT to learn this! she did mind-body on me.

Let me tell you, I felt things. I felt things swirling and whirling within my body, each and every move she made. I felt major pain in many of the moves that I do on others. She used a deeper technique then I'm used to and I almost cried from the pain of the depth! however, I breathed through it. Then she did a SP1 (mod 9) move on me around the scap and rhomboids...I almost started hyperventalating, then within 30 seconds after the move the tears started flowing! I was BAWLING, uncontrollable, full on, crying my eyes out, heaving with breath. holy cow... she grabbed me some tissue and sat next to the table and talked me through it. Took about 5-10 mins to let it all 'out' and then I felt like a weight had been lifted from my body. Literlaly. the moves prior to the one that brought me to tears I had expressed that I felt like my whole body was being pressed down into the massage table and I felt like a lead weight.

After I let it all out, I felt so light! And she did one more move on my kidneys, then we ended the session there. I actually felt repulsed by the idea of her doing even one more movement on my body - I was VERY done.

Today (the next day), I can make note that my back doesn't hurt -quite- as bad through the night but it's still not gone. however, Bowen can take up to 10 days to sink in, and I do still have some emotions to work through before I can probably say good bye to the physical pain. But as far as the anger goes, I felt like I had some good grip on things today. Things that would have sent me into a feeling of fury on the inside (and occasionally the outside) I felt like I could handle them.

That was my experiene :)

Bowen

I did it, I ordered ONE THOUSAND flyers...well, postcards lol as they were half the price, and I plan to deliver half of them end of August, and the other half end of October (maybe i'll give them out in the halloween bags? LOL jk).

Michael and I are in a phase of life where with this new house purchase we are in the 'living from paycheque to paycheque' phase. Yes, I am putting away money each paycheque, but certainly not as much as I'd like, and i'm CERTAINLY not happy with our debt load (aka: my mastercard) presently, so I have decided to do something about it. Basically the plan is to give up all my little jobs (newspapers, my tentative fall piano students, and babysitting) in order to focus on my passion: Bowen. Idealy I would like to have regularly 4-6 clients per week, all in 2-3 days. That way I can take Logan to his various Fall activities I have signed up for (and plan to sign up for) AND still have time for my kids.

Wish me luck!

Tina & Aaron's wedding day

My friend Tina from highschool got married yesterday and I had the pleasure of being a part of her wedding party. The plan was to take Carter and my mom and just deal with cranky Carter (who hates travelling and didn't have anywhere to nap, etc etc) so that I could nurse him the 2-3 times a day he still nurses. (nap times and bedtime specifically). Last minute (the night before) we decided my mom would just come to my house and watch Carter. I had my friend Mindy agree to come over at bedtime IF he was hysterical and in need of nursing, and nurse him for me (she has a baby boy a month older than Carter)...I'll tell you I felt odd asking but she's one person I knew would do it - and vice versa actually. Anyways, it didn't come to that but I just wanted the back up JUST in case.

So, I left at 8:30am and arrived at Tina's for hair-dos at 10. We got all dolled up and headed to the hotel to do some final set up and readying. The ceremony was at 3pm where I had the honor of witnessing and signing for their marriage. The wedding party was two girls and two guys - all of us married or engaged, which was really nice as it took the "single" edge of the day and we could all just have a good time and laugh and  joke and "flirt" in a non threatening way without any intentions or hidden agendas! After ceremony we hopped in a limo (one of those truck style limos) and headed off to get pictures done. (funny moment: we did the jumping picture and the photographer had the wedding party hold hands and I said 'make sure you dn't tell me husband' - but to be honest, i told him as soon as I got home because it was a little awkwrd holding another mans' hand!). Finished pictures and hopped back in the limo and back to the hotel (where the reception was also being held). We got back in time for dinner which was PHENOMINAL! There was multiple salads, there was deviled eggs, there was fruit and veggie platters, meat and cheese platters, cabbage rolls, roasted chicken, roast beef, potatoe wedges (baked i think), cooked veggies...it was a great spread! After dinner we mingled and such until speeches, garter tosses, cake cutting, first dances, etc. I stayed and danced a couple songs (which I haven't done in YEARS) and then left by 9 so I could get home at a decent hour.

I love love LOVED attending this wedding for many reasons. 1. It was great to see and catch up with old friends. 2. There was minimal alcohol consumption all around - a few beers or drinks floating around but all in all I don't think anyone got 'drunk' (at least when I left at 9 no one was LOL), 3. I got a day out all by myself! I have not had a day out in probably 3 years that was an ENTIRE day out (left home at 830am, arrived home 1030pm) that wasn't an 8 hour class or workshop (where i would promptly rush home to rescue whomever was watching my kids). I tell you, I had such a fantastic time! I didn't know a soul there other than the bride, other bridesmaid and Tina's immediate family but that was okay! It was still a blast. Everything was calm and relaxed and smooth sailing.

The bridesmaid dress: So I wore a baby pink dress, knee length with an added cap sleeve for modesty sake with silver open toed heels. (funny side note: I told Delaney (other bridesmaid) that I bought silver heels for the wedding, and she ended up getting the same shoes not knowing where I had gotten mine!). With hair and make up I felt super cute! I haven't seen the pictures yet which might show otherwise, but I felt like I 'fit in' with the other two girls who are super skinny! lol. the past month I have been focusing on just accepting me for me and loving me for me, something I had slipped away from the past few months, and one worry i had was being the 'big bridesmaid' at this wedding because I have bigger arms and legs than both other girls and am shorter then both also. Anyways, that wasn't the case, I felt equally 'checked out' and chatted with then Delaney, and I felt simply pretty all night long! It was just a perfect evening.

Tina: she looked absolutely STUNNING! She was elegent and gorgeous. she surprised me how calm and collected she was and how well she spoke in front of everyone and I have never seen her with Aaron before longer than 5 minutes, and I just knew that they were meant to be with how they acted and cared for each other all evening. Tina is unique in the sense that she is 28years old and before Aaron she never exclusively dated anyone else or slept with anyone else, etc. She was waiting for her future companion - whom she found 2.5 years ago and i'm so happy for her!

by the end of the evening I was very tired and ready to go home. I know I said how much I loved being away for a day and having fun, but I desperately missed my boys!! All day I was checking my phone waiting to hear something from michael or my mom but never got a msg, and by days end I just wanted to snuggle Logan and/or Carter and just be with them. so I rushed home and even tho I didn't see them, I felt better being near. :)

It was a great day and I cannot wait until the pictures are ready!! I'll post at a later date.

Weighing & Measuring

Well it's time to get really serious. I'm hoping that by writing this down I will feel that much more committed. I used to weigh and measure my food as whomever might read this probably already knows. Over the past 10 days or so I have been really well with trying to eat well, exercise and be happy all at the same time. I feel in a really good place today and am going to take the opportunity to start what used to work amazingly well for me. So when eating "program food" (that's where I get my portions and controls from is the FA food program) a new starter basically just eats vegetables and protein for the first while until getting control over her/his food...then at that point adds rice/potatoes. People's first comment to me is "but you need carbs in your diet"...what people's biggest misconception is that a carb is not strictly breads and such and there are actually many vegetables that are considered high in carbs (like peas and corn). Anyways, i'm planing to weigh and measure all my veggies and protein, and limit myself to maximum 3 proper servings of fruit a day, aiming to only have 2. And I'm altering "program" and if I am hungry mid meals I will have either veggies or fruit as a snack. I always -want- junk food mid day, so that will be my biggest challenge is just eating a healthy snack instead.

Anyways! that's that :) I am undecide what to do about parties and events yet so we'll just come across that when the time comes. In reality I would like to say that if i'm somewhere I won't eat any sweets, but I can't guarentee that at this point as it's been a real struggle this past year for me...cold turkey giving up all sugar seems to be unatainable for me these days, but of course that would be my preference...reality is I can't just 'have one' cookie or square or piece of cake, it's none or lots. So we'll just have to cross those bridges when they come up. If I can get a handle on my daily intake of good food maybe I can feel stronger at rejecting the tasty but not-so-good food.

Logan's Birthday Party

We survived! It was a BLAST! Logan had 11 friends over, so 12 kids in total (only one person didn't come that we were expecting so that's pretty good!). We did a drop-your-kid-off party this year, and Michael, my mom & I were the adults running the show. It was a movie themed PJ party. Friends came, we played til 6 then had birthday cake (a rocket ship cake that I lit sparklers on the one end to make it 'blast off'). Then we did present opening. This was the most challenging part of the day - it was really difficult keeping 11 sets of hands off of his presents with only 3 adults. I still don't have a clue who gave him a few of his recieved gifts. lol. Then we headed downstairs where I had two rooms set up. One room for the movie/popcorn, and one room for playing. The movie watching lasted about 40 mins before even the kids who were happy to just watch were too distracted to pay attention lol, so we lined everyone up and put on shoes and coats and headed outside! We ran around, played bubbles, played football, 'what time is it mr wolf', and attempted duck duck goose. :) We had so much fun!

People said I was crazy doing a drop off party with so many, but it really wasn't all that bad! sure it was go-go-go the whole time, and alot of work, but it was anticipated work. Would I do it again? Yes! Would I change things? of course! lol...I would specifically end the party half hour earlier as that's when the kids were done with the stuff I had planned and I wouldn't want to plan more because more often just ends up costing more.



So, happy birthday to my fantastic baby boy now a big THREE year old.

PS. He got spoiled this year (okay, he's just all around spoiled), our big gift to him was a quad: he looks darn cute on it!

PPS. I LOVE HIM! :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Out of my element...Kyla the boxer

We recently purchased a family pass to our local recreation center, which allows us access to all their classes, various facilities in the center and the walking/running track, etc. Today I opted to give the "Big Bag Boxing" class a shot. I walk into the room and I almost walked right back out as all that was in the waiting area was 4 BIG guys (like look like they could fight UFC) and then 2 women with muscles like i've never seen (also could fight UFC lol).

Needless to say I pressed on and it turned out as the next 5-10 mins passed by the class filled with more 'normal' company, and there was 2 other ladies trying for the first time.

WHAT A WORKOUT! Holy cow...the "warm-up" was it's own workout in and of itself. By 30 minutes all my muscles and body was so fatigued I thought when I had checked the clock that it had to have been at least 45 mins to an hour gone by. I -rarely- am in a class setting where I am fatigued like that. I love my Zumba because it's fun, but I don't get out of breath by it, and trust me, I dance hard! I'm not a sweater, and I didn't sweat in boxing, but boy was I WARM!

It was an awesome class and I hope I have the willpower to stick it out. Through the summer the only classes I can attend is Tuesday nights and Saturdays that we're in town (we're away at least 2 of the weekends due to camping and a bridal shower). But as I said, if I can stick it out for a month doing that I think i'll notice some nice results

The backyard "dream"

Alright, so the first thing that you will notice in my yard is that I have kids lol, there's dirt being dug in and toys all over (I cleaned up most of them prior to this picture being taken), and this picture doesn't show the other half of my yard, but since i'm on a corner lot I have a very wide yard. Basically what the plan is, I am going to remove all the stones and rebuild the wall, which will be pushed back about 2-4ft.

So in this picture you'll see the stones. What don't I like about the stones? 1. I think it looks messy. 2. You can't put a lawnchair or any chair on it without it being wobbly. 3.Weeds are growing up and through the stones. 4. Carter (and probably all my babies) finds all the tiny rocks and things - fingers to mouth. 5. My kids can't play on it - its awkward and uncomfortable to sit on, ride on or play on.

Okay, so looking at this picture you'll probably better envision my dream. Where the wall is will be extended out more into the yard in almost like an oval shape from the tree in the far left of the pic to the start of the wall at the front left. On that oval shape will deck rail or fence of sorts (i'd love to the glass railing if I can afford it). Then we will lay down DECK instead of stone. That will cover basically everything you see in the picture (except the cement patio of course)

So as far as the wall goes, being we have the material, we will rebuild the wall in its new location with the same stone, just farther out into the yard. So in the end there will be a wall, a flower bed approx 1.5-2ft wide, then the railing, then the deck.

The only thing I didn't mention is that along the fence by that same mentioned tree (which I like and will stay where it is) I will leave a dirt area for the kids to dig around in in the shape of L in and around the tree.

So the plan is for this year: 1. Pull out all the rocks and take down the wall. 2. Mark where the wall will go and start leveling out the dirt (hoping with what we'll have to dig down in order to the lay the deck will almost fill the 'holes' and we won't have to buy much dirt). 3. Rebuild wall and fill in/level ground.

Depending how much the deck costs will determine if we get it in this year or not. I would hope so but cost is everything! I spoke to a landscaper and he basically told me if we do the work ourselves theres no reason we couldn't lay a deck for around that $1000 mark. I will go and speak to Home Depot and see what they say as far as supplies go.

PS. Leftover stone will be used to build a firepit in the far corner of the yard (not shown in any of the picture), and possibly the ground for a fort for the boys in the other corner (not visable in pictures above either).